So much bad shit has happened in the last 7 days.
There have been many 19th birthdays.....and many hangovers.
Some hair was burnt, some people went to jail and some betrayal.
Finances have depressed me beyond physical exercise, but thankfully
I have managed. This is the first year that I have ever gotten an INSUFF FUNDS
at a debit purchase, and the first year that I will give a picture with an
"IOU 1 PRESENT (PICTURED)!"
Lack of money, lack of a christmas tree, lack of a father.
I don't know how much I'll be doing until the New Year, but I promise that
if I get tanked I'll blog, instead of other things. If I do other things, I'll be sure to take detailed notes on my encounters and sights. Mostly the sights.
Cut all radio transmission.
Agent Phantom
Status - Disavowed.
Thursday, December 23, 2004
Thursday, December 16, 2004
Let The Yule Times Roll
Just got back from the trainwreck that was physics. For the first time since Calculus, a test has made me it's bitch. I beg, I whine, I plead for mercy but all I get back is a nice prompt, "Fuck You!" But these things do not worry me anymore for the beast is over. Never again will I take a science class unless it's called "Planet Names 101." I know Vulcan, I know Vemshnup. What else do I have to worry about? Now, I prepare for my next battle. I'll probably need an army of at least 6,000 coughdrops, and a regiment of cash if I ever want to break throught the gates of Eaton.
Until then, I plan to put up a damn tree, and watch my annual list of Festive Flicks. The list stands as follows: (have you noticed yet, just how much I love to list things?)
- The Grinch (animated)
- Christmas Vacation
- Scrooged
- A Christmas Carol w/ Alistair
- A Christmas Story
- Charlie Brown Christmas
- Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
and the newest member:
- A BlackAdder Christmas
Until then, I plan to put up a damn tree, and watch my annual list of Festive Flicks. The list stands as follows: (have you noticed yet, just how much I love to list things?)
- The Grinch (animated)
- Christmas Vacation
- Scrooged
- A Christmas Carol w/ Alistair
- A Christmas Story
- Charlie Brown Christmas
- Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
and the newest member:
- A BlackAdder Christmas
Wednesday, December 15, 2004
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
FOTheR TwoT ROTKin is over!
At 3:58am, these eyes saw Sam return home for the first time.
Take that Mrs. Taylor! I refused to read your books then, and I still haven't read them now. (I also didn't have to pay anything!)
Take that Mrs. Taylor! I refused to read your books then, and I still haven't read them now. (I also didn't have to pay anything!)
The Odyssey of Homer
I noticed Texasgary was excited about the simpsons, and felt that I should also share my opinion of the greatness of Groening. This evening I caught the simpson's episode at the holy 5pm on CBC mass. It was the one where Homer's brother makes the baby translator. I knew which episode it was after the couch-vault incident and mentally scanned over the plot and punchlines to see if I should stay or switch. I decided to stay and was delighted to discover a brilliant gag I had forgotten.
Homer sitting in the Spinemelter 2000 + 1 balding man = 2001 joke i should have remembered
I started thinking back about other 2001 references and the only ones I could come up with were: the Dawn of Man spoof and the one where he goes into space.
On a completely unrelated note, after talking to Adam over MSN tonight I realized that due to my illness, my current nightmare is visiting the Eaton's Centre. So much standing and walking, so many unsuspecting victims. I'd be like a gaint hairless Marcel from Outbreak.
Homer sitting in the Spinemelter 2000 + 1 balding man = 2001 joke i should have remembered
I started thinking back about other 2001 references and the only ones I could come up with were: the Dawn of Man spoof and the one where he goes into space.
On a completely unrelated note, after talking to Adam over MSN tonight I realized that due to my illness, my current nightmare is visiting the Eaton's Centre. So much standing and walking, so many unsuspecting victims. I'd be like a gaint hairless Marcel from Outbreak.
Monday, December 13, 2004
Never Eat or Sleep
My weekend has been pretty damn lame.
Return of the Spit
Attack of the Coughs
The Phlegm Menace
Return of Pneumonia
The Sinus Strikes Back
A New Hope
I spent all of Thursday and Friday lying on the couch. My only solice was in my recent revival of my NES. For some reason, beating Mario helps me deal with being sick.
Friday night I went out for Shane's 19th birthday. We swung by work for a free tequila shot then went bar-hopping down Bloor. Had some liquid cocaine at Los Iguanas, then drank tequila at Paupers, Brunswick House and grabbed a last call at some Firkin place. Then we had a mickey of tequila. Cigars were had. Darts were thrown. I felt all special when I was able to direct people around Pauper's after last years 1MFF party.
Saturday I slept in til 11 and watched LOTR2 before work. It was my first viewing and was sadly interrupted every 3-20 minutes when the sound cut out. It was good, but I got lost once or twice. I checked everyone else's blog and happily I still have no idea who is going to die. Names aren't good in my head, because I only know about 6 characters (Frodo, Sam, Smeagle, Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas). I know another list of names and faces, but it turns into matching terms on a biology exam. I worked until 1:30am, picked up Martin at a nearby party and drove him home so he wouldn't freeze his bollocks, then slept and arrived at work for 11:15am. Had to do some of the grossest jobs ever, before I went to a classy Christmas party. Despite the fact that I had to woozily stand for an hour, I got to walk around a house thinking "So this is what it's like to have "taste'...."
Last night I watched "A Bear Named Winnie" with my mom. At 8pm I was thinking of some excuse to get the hell away from the TV but by 9 i was hooked. It was alright. There was a cool little dissolve near the end as well. I spent the rest of the night watching EM: Home Edition and talking to Bex. We talked about the sad state of her computer, then played with people's heads on Inklink.
Today will consist of not going to the doctor, but playing
Batman and watching LOTR3. I'll probably start studying for my exam around 7pm or until I get bored with everything else in my life.
Return of the Spit
Attack of the Coughs
The Phlegm Menace
Return of Pneumonia
The Sinus Strikes Back
A New Hope
I spent all of Thursday and Friday lying on the couch. My only solice was in my recent revival of my NES. For some reason, beating Mario helps me deal with being sick.
Friday night I went out for Shane's 19th birthday. We swung by work for a free tequila shot then went bar-hopping down Bloor. Had some liquid cocaine at Los Iguanas, then drank tequila at Paupers, Brunswick House and grabbed a last call at some Firkin place. Then we had a mickey of tequila. Cigars were had. Darts were thrown. I felt all special when I was able to direct people around Pauper's after last years 1MFF party.
Saturday I slept in til 11 and watched LOTR2 before work. It was my first viewing and was sadly interrupted every 3-20 minutes when the sound cut out. It was good, but I got lost once or twice. I checked everyone else's blog and happily I still have no idea who is going to die. Names aren't good in my head, because I only know about 6 characters (Frodo, Sam, Smeagle, Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas). I know another list of names and faces, but it turns into matching terms on a biology exam. I worked until 1:30am, picked up Martin at a nearby party and drove him home so he wouldn't freeze his bollocks, then slept and arrived at work for 11:15am. Had to do some of the grossest jobs ever, before I went to a classy Christmas party. Despite the fact that I had to woozily stand for an hour, I got to walk around a house thinking "So this is what it's like to have "taste'...."
Last night I watched "A Bear Named Winnie" with my mom. At 8pm I was thinking of some excuse to get the hell away from the TV but by 9 i was hooked. It was alright. There was a cool little dissolve near the end as well. I spent the rest of the night watching EM: Home Edition and talking to Bex. We talked about the sad state of her computer, then played with people's heads on Inklink.
Today will consist of not going to the doctor, but playing
Batman and watching LOTR3. I'll probably start studying for my exam around 7pm or until I get bored with everything else in my life.
XXX-MAS
Since I have nothing better to do, I am going to try and make some bizarre christmas audio posts.
Be sure to look forward to appearances by:
Beavis and Butthead
An electric guitar
Steve Martin
Bing Crosby
and more!
Be sure to look forward to appearances by:
Beavis and Butthead
An electric guitar
Steve Martin
Bing Crosby
and more!
Friday, December 10, 2004
There's A Home Depot at the End of the Tunnel
When I was at Ben's barmitzfah, I got one of those vibey deja-vus. Bex was listing off some relatives, and I suddenly realized that I had done this before in a dream. Now I know that sound's like ..., but over the years I've developed the belief that my dreams are a preview of upcoming events. It's probably just generality clashing with coincedence, but I really enjoy thinking this.
On Monday however, I had a rough night. I haven't had a nightmare for about 5 years (nothing beats the recurring cave nightmare or The Maze) and I haven't had a dream for a couple of weeks (that I can vividly recall). It turns out I was due for my next mindtrip and it was a bad trip indeed. I dreamt:
That I was walking down Mcrae just past Bill and Vito's Garage in the middle of the night. I was feeling a little paranoid (when do I not), and I noticed a white car ahead of me. It was sort of parked in the middle of the street but the engine was running. For some reason, I thought the car looked like one of the models from Grand Theft Auto, and I immediately thought I was in the game. It was only 2 seconds later that I heard a voice come from the car..."That's him.".....and the car takes off. I look behind me and see another white car speeding down the street. I take off! It turns in behind me and a guy leans out the window with an uzi-like gun. I freak and start zigzaging away from him. (Thinking back I realized that I was running in my N64 Goldeneye evasion pattern. The sidesteps and jukes all matched.) The gun starts spewing out bullets and I see them ricochet off the ground beside and go zipping off at the horizon. Suddenly, I get a sort of matrix-slow-mo tail-on shot of this bullet, which looks more like shrapnel, floating towards my back. It hits me on the backleft of my neck.
I don't feel like anything has happened but everything has gone a little quiet and i reach around. Sure enough there's blood on my fingers and all of a sudden I notice the Home Depot across Laird. It's bright as ever but suddenly different chunks of the world begin to blackout. It was as if I was standing in a long corridor and the lights were being shut off towards me. Kind of like when Seraph and Sati are leaving the Oracle's in the third movie. The home depot continued to shine but the different planes went out in a row. When the foremost plane went out, I collapsed.
(AWAKE)
The first things I thought of were "shit this is going to happen to me," "fuck that would be cool to put in a movie" and "I don't want to go back to bed." I lay awake for 20 minutes petrified until I was too tired to keep my eyes open.
On Monday however, I had a rough night. I haven't had a nightmare for about 5 years (nothing beats the recurring cave nightmare or The Maze) and I haven't had a dream for a couple of weeks (that I can vividly recall). It turns out I was due for my next mindtrip and it was a bad trip indeed. I dreamt:
That I was walking down Mcrae just past Bill and Vito's Garage in the middle of the night. I was feeling a little paranoid (when do I not), and I noticed a white car ahead of me. It was sort of parked in the middle of the street but the engine was running. For some reason, I thought the car looked like one of the models from Grand Theft Auto, and I immediately thought I was in the game. It was only 2 seconds later that I heard a voice come from the car..."That's him.".....and the car takes off. I look behind me and see another white car speeding down the street. I take off! It turns in behind me and a guy leans out the window with an uzi-like gun. I freak and start zigzaging away from him. (Thinking back I realized that I was running in my N64 Goldeneye evasion pattern. The sidesteps and jukes all matched.) The gun starts spewing out bullets and I see them ricochet off the ground beside and go zipping off at the horizon. Suddenly, I get a sort of matrix-slow-mo tail-on shot of this bullet, which looks more like shrapnel, floating towards my back. It hits me on the backleft of my neck.
I don't feel like anything has happened but everything has gone a little quiet and i reach around. Sure enough there's blood on my fingers and all of a sudden I notice the Home Depot across Laird. It's bright as ever but suddenly different chunks of the world begin to blackout. It was as if I was standing in a long corridor and the lights were being shut off towards me. Kind of like when Seraph and Sati are leaving the Oracle's in the third movie. The home depot continued to shine but the different planes went out in a row. When the foremost plane went out, I collapsed.
(AWAKE)
The first things I thought of were "shit this is going to happen to me," "fuck that would be cool to put in a movie" and "I don't want to go back to bed." I lay awake for 20 minutes petrified until I was too tired to keep my eyes open.
Thursday, December 09, 2004
Christmas is just plain weird
What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree in the living room and eat candy out of your socks? - Thanks Ron
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
Be Sure To Watch Out For Chazwazzlers
It's 1pm. I was up til 4am studying for my mid-term. I've decided to take one quick run through the terms then play grand theft auto until I have to leave....or the other way around.
I was trying to think up some sort of brilliant joke about Taking Your Kid To Work and Little Nature screwing around with Mother Nature's weather panel, but all I could think of was this other joke.
Who's bigger? Mama Bigger or Baby Bigger?
Baby Bigger cause he's a little Bigger.
That's been in my head every since I finished reading Seth's "Its A Good Life If You Don't Weaken." It's the last book that we are supposed to study in my english lit class and the most recently published on the list. I finally got my hands on one of the copies, and was unable to let his sit til April. Why? Because in April we will be studying a comic book. 120 pages of comics that I get to read in class. It's all about a guy who's depressed and has nothing to do. He reads a New Yorker and goes in search of an obscure cartoonist named Kalo. The drawing is only topped by the writing. It's a good read but it's a short read...Although I guess all comic books are short reads. Well this "picture novella" is good. It's a
I was trying to think up some sort of brilliant joke about Taking Your Kid To Work and Little Nature screwing around with Mother Nature's weather panel, but all I could think of was this other joke.
Who's bigger? Mama Bigger or Baby Bigger?
Baby Bigger cause he's a little Bigger.
That's been in my head every since I finished reading Seth's "Its A Good Life If You Don't Weaken." It's the last book that we are supposed to study in my english lit class and the most recently published on the list. I finally got my hands on one of the copies, and was unable to let his sit til April. Why? Because in April we will be studying a comic book. 120 pages of comics that I get to read in class. It's all about a guy who's depressed and has nothing to do. He reads a New Yorker and goes in search of an obscure cartoonist named Kalo. The drawing is only topped by the writing. It's a good read but it's a short read...Although I guess all comic books are short reads. Well this "picture novella" is good. It's a
Tuesday, December 07, 2004
Nothing Matters But The Weekend....From A Tuesday Point Of View
So the studying is not going so well. My prof freaked the hell out of me when he brought up (what I thought were) obscure terms like continuity editing. This essay is going to suck my ass. I have 50 minutes to panic, sweat, freak out, scribble a thesis down, cry about how I have 10 minutes left, and develop a hand-cramp after writing 4 paragraphs in 5 minutes.
Why can't all tests be multiple choice? Everyone loves the multiplicity and the attempt to decipher the code. Do I pick all C s? Do I spell ACDC, BAD ACE CAB? Do I go with my trusted formula since grade 2 (BDADC(E)BC(E)AD)? Too much crap to learn...too little time.
The house is officially full of nog. I have already had one carton, and am currently on my first Nogache of the season. I expect many more to come, and at least 3 of them to be from some "Nogged" Nog.
I finally cracked today and went over to Shane's to play San Andreas. The weather was a shit storm of depression (The Red Rocket is dying, mid term tomorrow) and I needed some cheering up. I refused to complete any missions so I just drove around the city and punched a stoner in the nuts....repeatedly. While I was in an excellent mood when I left for home, I find myself unable to read a book as a keep drifting back to that crackhead's crotch......
Why can't all tests be multiple choice? Everyone loves the multiplicity and the attempt to decipher the code. Do I pick all C s? Do I spell ACDC, BAD ACE CAB? Do I go with my trusted formula since grade 2 (BDADC(E)BC(E)AD)? Too much crap to learn...too little time.
The house is officially full of nog. I have already had one carton, and am currently on my first Nogache of the season. I expect many more to come, and at least 3 of them to be from some "Nogged" Nog.
I finally cracked today and went over to Shane's to play San Andreas. The weather was a shit storm of depression (The Red Rocket is dying, mid term tomorrow) and I needed some cheering up. I refused to complete any missions so I just drove around the city and punched a stoner in the nuts....repeatedly. While I was in an excellent mood when I left for home, I find myself unable to read a book as a keep drifting back to that crackhead's crotch......
Monday, December 06, 2004
Struggling
Do not want to blog! My back hurts too much in this piece-of-shit chair. My favourite high school teacher used to tell me that if I didn't have enough time to finish my essay, I should just write all of my ideas down in point-form. Here goes:
-best weekend ever
-no better way to enter exams
-lots of things that start with B
Friday
-went to burlesque "Merry Stripmas" by Skin Tight, Outta Sight"with Bex, Texasgary and Tederick
-one of only double dates in my life that didn't involve fifth wheels
-went to see Mark shake his ass
-saw Mark shake his ass
-MC was lude, unfunny and very pantless
-performers were great (Anastasia's hotness, Coco Le Creme's awesome costumes, Scarlet Sylphide's "Veruca Salt," getting turned on by the Grinch thanks to Suaci Calla Horra, envying Tanya Cheex for enjoying every moment on stage)
-shoddiest lookin joint I've seen in a long time (from the outside...and inside lobby)
-Mysterion the Mind Reader would not want to read my mind
- The Wetspots were amazing. Masturbation is OK, Stripper's Medley among others were awesome
-for fuller details see (since I have a serious lack of a camera and energy to write) visit Texasgary
Saturday
- slept in by accident and didn't go to One of a Kind craft show with my mom (also missed Signatures due to work. crap.)
- woke up and rolled into Bex's car to make it to Ben's Barmitzvah
- made chit-chat with a whole bunch of people I "know" but I don't know.
- Ceremony was amazing. Ben did an awesome job! (but he'll never read this! Ha Ha!)
- I nailed Ben in the nuts with my green candy.
- Candle ceremony was amazing
- I've got my own freakin Yamulka now!!
- Dinner was amazing
- Bar was open (stocked with Tequila.....at a Barmitzfah!?!?)
- Bex was outstanding as MC even though her dad stole the mic at one point
- I got to light a candle around Ben's cake...to the Rocky theme song!
- Dessert was a yummy strawberry sorbet or sherbert, whichever you call them. I flip-flop
- Got to do some long-awaited dancing with Bex
- Made fun of Ben after DJ chose my "Stairway to Heaven" by Zep over his "The End" by Doors as last slow song.
- Love for Bex is now official
- used to have a tradition at public school where I asked the girl I really liked to dance to Stairway (even though I had no clue who Zep were)
- Got a little drunk
- corrupted some young minds after party while Bex tried to impower young women
- played with glowsticks and my sexy, LED guitar
- got back to Bex after nasty cab hunt and watched Ben make an assload of money in 4 minutes
Sunday
-worked
Monday (Today)
- went to Bex at 10am
- played PS2 for a while
- lay naked in bed all day with the woman I love
- came home with hurt back thanks to broken boards in bedframe
- trying to start with the studying for Film Mid-term
-best weekend ever
-no better way to enter exams
-lots of things that start with B
Friday
-went to burlesque "Merry Stripmas" by Skin Tight, Outta Sight"with Bex, Texasgary and Tederick
-one of only double dates in my life that didn't involve fifth wheels
-went to see Mark shake his ass
-saw Mark shake his ass
-MC was lude, unfunny and very pantless
-performers were great (Anastasia's hotness, Coco Le Creme's awesome costumes, Scarlet Sylphide's "Veruca Salt," getting turned on by the Grinch thanks to Suaci Calla Horra, envying Tanya Cheex for enjoying every moment on stage)
-shoddiest lookin joint I've seen in a long time (from the outside...and inside lobby)
-Mysterion the Mind Reader would not want to read my mind
- The Wetspots were amazing. Masturbation is OK, Stripper's Medley among others were awesome
-for fuller details see (since I have a serious lack of a camera and energy to write) visit Texasgary
Saturday
- slept in by accident and didn't go to One of a Kind craft show with my mom (also missed Signatures due to work. crap.)
- woke up and rolled into Bex's car to make it to Ben's Barmitzvah
- made chit-chat with a whole bunch of people I "know" but I don't know.
- Ceremony was amazing. Ben did an awesome job! (but he'll never read this! Ha Ha!)
- I nailed Ben in the nuts with my green candy.
- Candle ceremony was amazing
- I've got my own freakin Yamulka now!!
- Dinner was amazing
- Bar was open (stocked with Tequila.....at a Barmitzfah!?!?)
- Bex was outstanding as MC even though her dad stole the mic at one point
- I got to light a candle around Ben's cake...to the Rocky theme song!
- Dessert was a yummy strawberry sorbet or sherbert, whichever you call them. I flip-flop
- Got to do some long-awaited dancing with Bex
- Made fun of Ben after DJ chose my "Stairway to Heaven" by Zep over his "The End" by Doors as last slow song.
- Love for Bex is now official
- used to have a tradition at public school where I asked the girl I really liked to dance to Stairway (even though I had no clue who Zep were)
- Got a little drunk
- corrupted some young minds after party while Bex tried to impower young women
- played with glowsticks and my sexy, LED guitar
- got back to Bex after nasty cab hunt and watched Ben make an assload of money in 4 minutes
Sunday
-worked
Monday (Today)
- went to Bex at 10am
- played PS2 for a while
- lay naked in bed all day with the woman I love
- came home with hurt back thanks to broken boards in bedframe
- trying to start with the studying for Film Mid-term
Winterpeg!?!?
What the fuck?
Did Jill Macyshon just say "There are two seasons here: Winter and Construction" because that joke is so old.
How old is it?
That joke is so old......that joke.....is so old....Ha!......That joke is so old that it's got a botox appointment next tuesday. HIYO!
Did Jill Macyshon just say "There are two seasons here: Winter and Construction" because that joke is so old.
How old is it?
That joke is so old......that joke.....is so old....Ha!......That joke is so old that it's got a botox appointment next tuesday. HIYO!
Thursday, December 02, 2004
If We Never Take Time, How Can We Ever Waste Time?
Well that was a pain in the ass. The only remnant of the site before I redid the whole thing, the matrix code at the side, is the only thing I haven't gotten back up yet. Time for work. The madness will continue after I eat my ham.
Square One
I don't know how this happened but something fucked up! Now I have to go back and redo everything that has been the fruits of all my time wasting. Does someone hate me or am I just a black cloud of fuck-ups?
My Red Rocket
The first rule of Steve's car: Buckle up!
The second rule of Steve's car: BUCKLE UP!
The third rule of Steve's car: Do not grip the dashboard or cling to objects in the car. It pisses me off.
The fourth rule of Steve's car: Do not touch the radio.
The fifth rule of Steve's car: Green means go fast. Yellow means go faster. Red means get ready to go fast!
The sixth rule of Steve's car: Trust in Steve. You are not in harm. If you get hurt, the car must get hurt and that is very sad.
The seventh and final rule of Steve's car: BYOE(arplugs) - Volume subject to change at any time.
The second rule of Steve's car: BUCKLE UP!
The third rule of Steve's car: Do not grip the dashboard or cling to objects in the car. It pisses me off.
The fourth rule of Steve's car: Do not touch the radio.
The fifth rule of Steve's car: Green means go fast. Yellow means go faster. Red means get ready to go fast!
The sixth rule of Steve's car: Trust in Steve. You are not in harm. If you get hurt, the car must get hurt and that is very sad.
The seventh and final rule of Steve's car: BYOE(arplugs) - Volume subject to change at any time.
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
That's What It's All About
"With all the sadness in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person which almost went unnoticed last week.
Larry La Prise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died peacefully at the age of 93.
The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started......"
Larry La Prise, the man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died peacefully at the age of 93.
The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started......"
My eyes! Ze Glasses Do Nothing!
Today was our film screening for the Avand-Garde portion of the course. We watched REM's "Low" yesterday and some other short stuff (Ragenet and The Garden of Delights?). My eyes have never hurt so much, and I almost fell asleep in a theatre for the first time in my life. I didn't. Thank god. I'm not ruining that track record.
Today we watched:
Ballet mécanique (not bad, but nothing to brag about)
Meshes of the Afternoon (good)
A Movie (ok)
Water Window Baby Moving (a baby's graphic birth......GRAPHIC! The head literally goes pop!)
Serene Velocity
Serene Velocity I had heard of through my circle of online psychadelia friends, and it lived up to it's trippy reputation, but it sucked. It was definetely innovative, but the novelty wore off after a while. 7 minutes of a "pulsing" hallway.
My three favourite of the day were:
Outer Space
Our Lady of the Sphere
Mongoloid (Devo music video....I think)
I'm only two days in, but I really love with Peter Tscherkassky.
On the topic of movies, I went into HMV to drool over the Matrix collection, which I forgot comes out on the 7th, and found some odd DVDs. First, it's the 10th anniversary of The Shawshank Redemption and it's been put out in a brank spanking new DVD, with a new, butt ugly cover, or maybe I just love the movie so much I don't want it to change.
Second, If you ever plan to rob an HMV in the near future, could you grab this or this for me? Much obliged.
Today we watched:
Ballet mécanique (not bad, but nothing to brag about)
Meshes of the Afternoon (good)
A Movie (ok)
Water Window Baby Moving (a baby's graphic birth......GRAPHIC! The head literally goes pop!)
Serene Velocity
Serene Velocity I had heard of through my circle of online psychadelia friends, and it lived up to it's trippy reputation, but it sucked. It was definetely innovative, but the novelty wore off after a while. 7 minutes of a "pulsing" hallway.
My three favourite of the day were:
Outer Space
Our Lady of the Sphere
Mongoloid (Devo music video....I think)
I'm only two days in, but I really love with Peter Tscherkassky.
On the topic of movies, I went into HMV to drool over the Matrix collection, which I forgot comes out on the 7th, and found some odd DVDs. First, it's the 10th anniversary of The Shawshank Redemption and it's been put out in a brank spanking new DVD, with a new, butt ugly cover, or maybe I just love the movie so much I don't want it to change.
Second, If you ever plan to rob an HMV in the near future, could you grab this or this for me? Much obliged.
Tuesday, November 30, 2004
Fly, Fat Ass Fly!
Is your day lacking in obscure sounds? Are you growing bored of listening to your same voice over and over? Then click here.
My personal favourites are Toot my own horn and pretty much the entire mallrats board.
My personal favourites are Toot my own horn and pretty much the entire mallrats board.
Trivial Tragedy
It's go time. I had a crappy day and I'm in the mood to see someone lose. Hopefully badly. Tonight might be the night that Ken Jennings starts Mormin' it up once again. A&E is supposed to have a biography on the champions of Jeopardy tomorrow and Ken will be on Letterman tonight. Normally, TV scheduling can predict any downfall and this is one instance that I hope it's right.
It's not that I hate Ken, I just don't like him. Something about him just rubs me the wrong way. I won't deny that he's a brilliant man (or endlessly fed), but I hope it's his time. I want to get back to the days where everyone would get the Final wrong and it would all come down to who saved one measly dollar. I feel another Richard is Hatching among us and that we'll never hear the end of Ken. I can already see the books littering every Indigo display window, and the obscure cameos that will come. Will Scary Movie 4 spoof some smart movies and have Ken come in at the end and explain it all to us? How long will it be before Ken is a celebrity that has to find a mole or simply just wants to get off an island?
Oh, and apparently there's a seinfeld category tonight. Please oh please!
Charles Van Doren, wherever you are, fight for your existence. Don't let some pencil pusher take away the glory of disturbing longevity on a game show.
It's not that I hate Ken, I just don't like him. Something about him just rubs me the wrong way. I won't deny that he's a brilliant man (or endlessly fed), but I hope it's his time. I want to get back to the days where everyone would get the Final wrong and it would all come down to who saved one measly dollar. I feel another Richard is Hatching among us and that we'll never hear the end of Ken. I can already see the books littering every Indigo display window, and the obscure cameos that will come. Will Scary Movie 4 spoof some smart movies and have Ken come in at the end and explain it all to us? How long will it be before Ken is a celebrity that has to find a mole or simply just wants to get off an island?
Oh, and apparently there's a seinfeld category tonight. Please oh please!
Charles Van Doren, wherever you are, fight for your existence. Don't let some pencil pusher take away the glory of disturbing longevity on a game show.
Wear Your Emotions
So I found out today that my irish exam isn't on Thursday, or even Friday....
It was today.
It was today.
What do you like to do at 2:20am?
I like to study an irish verb book with a Powerpuff Girls pen up my left nostril while I listen to big band music. You got a problem with that?
Monday, November 29, 2004
This is what happens when sentences sneeze.
How bored are you guys?
Putting together Haikus?
I will not take part.
OK, I just might,
But it will be matrix style,
For I have no life.
Am I coloured blue,
Or are my eyes not open?
I will fight my mind!
Never wears white clothes,
Eats many warm bowls of snot,
Observes through dark shades.
Gezundheit!
Putting together Haikus?
I will not take part.
OK, I just might,
But it will be matrix style,
For I have no life.
Am I coloured blue,
Or are my eyes not open?
I will fight my mind!
Never wears white clothes,
Eats many warm bowls of snot,
Observes through dark shades.
Gezundheit!
Happiest Transportation Day of the Month!
We're slowly approaching December which means only one thing....
NEW TTC PUZZLES!!!!!
These trivia tidbits help pass the time on my way to school until I've solved them all, then I like to listen to the other people try to figure them out. My shining moment came last month when Bex and I were waiting on some subway platform before the post-Spiral party at the Dominion. We went through all of them, but couldn't get past HOROBOD. She went and talked to the other party-goers but I sat there on that red bench staring at the poster. Five minutes later, I casually walked over and said, "Robin Hood."
This month's puzzles are out and I've already made my guesses as to the answers.
My answers will appear invisible below:
Puzzle 1
68
Puzzle 2
A hole. (This is one of those ones that I thought everyone knew)
Puzzle 3
Back to square one. ------- Anyone for tennis?
---------------------------------------------
Shop til you drop. --------- Big bad wolf.
NEW TTC PUZZLES!!!!!
These trivia tidbits help pass the time on my way to school until I've solved them all, then I like to listen to the other people try to figure them out. My shining moment came last month when Bex and I were waiting on some subway platform before the post-Spiral party at the Dominion. We went through all of them, but couldn't get past HOROBOD. She went and talked to the other party-goers but I sat there on that red bench staring at the poster. Five minutes later, I casually walked over and said, "Robin Hood."
This month's puzzles are out and I've already made my guesses as to the answers.
My answers will appear invisible below:
Puzzle 1
68
Puzzle 2
A hole. (This is one of those ones that I thought everyone knew)
Puzzle 3
Back to square one. ------- Anyone for tennis?
---------------------------------------------
Shop til you drop. --------- Big bad wolf.
The Sleepy Irishman in Days of Bore!
Cue the music.
Raise the curtain!
It's time for a freakout.
I found out today that my first university exam is in 3 days! Not only is this short notice in my head, but it happens to be for the class that I have not attended for the last two weeks due to other projects. However it came to this....I'm here. So now I must learn an obscure language in 72 hours. I can't watch any movies while I study, this isn't high school anymore, and I can't really listen to music.
I tried to do some work this weekend, but I have been exhausted. I stayed home on saturday after playing some pool in the afternoon (I sunk the 9 on two consecutive shots!), which might have been my first saturday at home since september. Work was brutal. For seven hours, all i wanted to do was sit and the new girl was 40 minutes late. I had to rush to finish all of the ice by myself, and it ended up getting fucked by some as-of-now unknown factor. I don't like the new girl. She asks too many questions and she's not pretty. I'm not saying that I don't like her simply because she's not pretty, but let's just say her face reminded me of Lionel Hutz's response to his lack of pants.Yes, her face called for a "Daaa!" But she's really nice!
No cup of coffee has been able to save me from my narcoleptic cage, but I did enjoy a good bagel w/ cream cheese this morning. I never give cream cheese the respect it deserves. Every time someone mentions cream cheese, I squirm and make all the boyish noises that I hold so dearly. But frankly, whenever i am given a leftover half of someone's morning snack, I enjoy every bite and savour the flavour til my next meal. Did I dare eat products of cream cheese land and tell no one?
Raise the curtain!
It's time for a freakout.
I found out today that my first university exam is in 3 days! Not only is this short notice in my head, but it happens to be for the class that I have not attended for the last two weeks due to other projects. However it came to this....I'm here. So now I must learn an obscure language in 72 hours. I can't watch any movies while I study, this isn't high school anymore, and I can't really listen to music.
I tried to do some work this weekend, but I have been exhausted. I stayed home on saturday after playing some pool in the afternoon (I sunk the 9 on two consecutive shots!), which might have been my first saturday at home since september. Work was brutal. For seven hours, all i wanted to do was sit and the new girl was 40 minutes late. I had to rush to finish all of the ice by myself, and it ended up getting fucked by some as-of-now unknown factor. I don't like the new girl. She asks too many questions and she's not pretty. I'm not saying that I don't like her simply because she's not pretty, but let's just say her face reminded me of Lionel Hutz's response to his lack of pants.Yes, her face called for a "Daaa!" But she's really nice!
No cup of coffee has been able to save me from my narcoleptic cage, but I did enjoy a good bagel w/ cream cheese this morning. I never give cream cheese the respect it deserves. Every time someone mentions cream cheese, I squirm and make all the boyish noises that I hold so dearly. But frankly, whenever i am given a leftover half of someone's morning snack, I enjoy every bite and savour the flavour til my next meal. Did I dare eat products of cream cheese land and tell no one?
Saturday, November 27, 2004
No Exit
So I finished the assignment at 5:34am but couldn't fall asleep until 6:30. A little too much caffeine I'd say. Ah well. I went to my classes and got back my first quiz (100 Baby!). When I got home my head hit the pillow. I took a good solid nap before shane came over. We ended up eating pizza and walking around the neighbourhood. We eventually found ourselves exploring the area around don mills, NORTH of eglinton. North of eglinton does not even register in my head so we decided to look around there. Eventually, we made our way back to leaside and thorncliffe.
Let me now present one of the most eerie moments in my life. Shane and I walked up from overlea and as I was leaving the sidewalk, a car sped in behind me. I walked up to the front door and noticed the "closed - backin10" sign. A security guard stood by as another man came up from the pumps, and after trying the locked door, we were buzzed in.
As I was about to leave, the clerk asked me to come behind the counter. I was pretty out of it at this point, and misheard him. He told me that I had to exit out the back. As the man and I walked through the back, I heard the clerk mutter something like "...there's something happening out front. . . ." Now I don't consider Thorncliffe to be a "bad" neighbourhood but I've heard rumors and seen a few odd things. I came around the back of the building and I see the same car that sped in behind me, peel out of the driveway. Did I hear a pop or were my ears just playing tricks on me like they usually do? Shane was busy observing the mad driver take off when I asked him if heard a pop noise? "No." "I heard that!"
Shane said he didn't think anything happened and I never went back to check.
All in all, this was an eventful night. I got lost in suburbia hell above wynford park and actually ended up walking in a circle throughout the identical houses. (I can't remember the last time that happened.) The night also produced many fantastic phrases including:
(When leaving a party or bar)
"Well I think it's time I left. The Idiot has to go home to his Box."
The only other thing to note: As we were walking around in suburbia hell, we stopped in a park to rest for a while (that park was the later discovered START of my lap). I was still pretty energetic at this point and vented about how i wished I had a soccer ball, and the fun I used to have, kicking it straight up in the air after school. When we got to Leaside, we ended up stopping in Trace Manes before the final leg home. I noticed that the boards and supports were stacked nearby, waiting to become a giant rink for some small kid. I peered into one of the columns of supports. . . a soccer ball. I fished my wish. Good fun was had by all, and I returned the ball for another lucky kicker.
Let me now present one of the most eerie moments in my life. Shane and I walked up from overlea and as I was leaving the sidewalk, a car sped in behind me. I walked up to the front door and noticed the "closed - backin10" sign. A security guard stood by as another man came up from the pumps, and after trying the locked door, we were buzzed in.
As I was about to leave, the clerk asked me to come behind the counter. I was pretty out of it at this point, and misheard him. He told me that I had to exit out the back. As the man and I walked through the back, I heard the clerk mutter something like "...there's something happening out front. . . ." Now I don't consider Thorncliffe to be a "bad" neighbourhood but I've heard rumors and seen a few odd things. I came around the back of the building and I see the same car that sped in behind me, peel out of the driveway. Did I hear a pop or were my ears just playing tricks on me like they usually do? Shane was busy observing the mad driver take off when I asked him if heard a pop noise? "No." "I heard that!"
Shane said he didn't think anything happened and I never went back to check.
All in all, this was an eventful night. I got lost in suburbia hell above wynford park and actually ended up walking in a circle throughout the identical houses. (I can't remember the last time that happened.) The night also produced many fantastic phrases including:
(When leaving a party or bar)
"Well I think it's time I left. The Idiot has to go home to his Box."
The only other thing to note: As we were walking around in suburbia hell, we stopped in a park to rest for a while (that park was the later discovered START of my lap). I was still pretty energetic at this point and vented about how i wished I had a soccer ball, and the fun I used to have, kicking it straight up in the air after school. When we got to Leaside, we ended up stopping in Trace Manes before the final leg home. I noticed that the boards and supports were stacked nearby, waiting to become a giant rink for some small kid. I peered into one of the columns of supports. . . a soccer ball. I fished my wish. Good fun was had by all, and I returned the ball for another lucky kicker.
Friday, November 26, 2004
I Hope You Get A Boil On Your Semprini!!!
The time now on Phantomfilm is 2:00am. Stay tuned for later when it will be 2:10am. If you missed 2:05am, be sure to tune in next week when it will be 5 after 2.
This is what I am doing instead of writing my film essay. This post serves 3 purposes.
Purpose the First
It allows me to procrastinate and push this mother even further into the night.
Purpose the Second
It allows me to say how much I love the Monty Python episode entitled "The Buzz Aldrin Show." If you own this gem (I KNOW WHO YOU ARE! IVE MENTALLY RAPED YOUR DVD COLLECTIONS!), I would suggest watching it again. Chemists, Semprini, Freemasons, "The Bishop!": it's all good!
Purpose the Second (or Third for those of you keeping track)
I wish to express my hatred for all of you other bloggers. Either stop being funny or stop being. Do you have any idea how hard it is to study Mise-en-Scene in a silent film when all I want to do is read your blogs? It sucks beans is what it does! That's it I'm goin for coffee! No! Don't come after me......unless you're paying.
This is what I am doing instead of writing my film essay. This post serves 3 purposes.
Purpose the First
It allows me to procrastinate and push this mother even further into the night.
Purpose the Second
It allows me to say how much I love the Monty Python episode entitled "The Buzz Aldrin Show." If you own this gem (I KNOW WHO YOU ARE! IVE MENTALLY RAPED YOUR DVD COLLECTIONS!), I would suggest watching it again. Chemists, Semprini, Freemasons, "The Bishop!": it's all good!
Purpose the Second (or Third for those of you keeping track)
I wish to express my hatred for all of you other bloggers. Either stop being funny or stop being. Do you have any idea how hard it is to study Mise-en-Scene in a silent film when all I want to do is read your blogs? It sucks beans is what it does! That's it I'm goin for coffee! No! Don't come after me......unless you're paying.
Thursday, November 25, 2004
Thoughts For The Day
Just thought I'd share a few treasures I stumbled across today.
How cool is that?!? Star Wars just scored some more points...if that's possible.
Could this possibly represent the manipulation of free will in The Matrix?
Maybe.
How cool is that?!? Star Wars just scored some more points...if that's possible.
Could this possibly represent the manipulation of free will in The Matrix?
Maybe.
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
It's beginning to look a lot like bankruptcy!
Oh man. I think this will be a white Christmas because there will certainly be no green. It's a miracle that all of the games I want will be coming out after Christmas or there would just be no chance. I discovered the mind-splitting news of the Matrix DVDs earlier but now I'm thinking I should go find a few legal pads because this year the list is huge. It's also matricized! So far the front runners for "Must Have Gift" are: Electric guitar, Matrix DVDs, Matrix comics or video camera (most likely used to film matrix-like shorts). I suppose I should ask for more useful items like new shoes since my current right foot gets drenched every rainfall, but that's just not me baby! Some measure their wealth by their bank accounts or the cars they drive or the clothes they wear, I prefer wealth to be defined as how many movie related items I can fit in my room. For a second there I started to sound like Tyler D.
After Christmas is a completely different story. Once my books are bought for school, it's a video game buying free-for-all. The current list is GTA: San Andreas, Halo 2, Half-life 2, KOTOR 2: Sith Lords and Inspector Parker: Betrapped.
Missing Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic Star Wars: Jedi Knight + Jedi Knight Outcast Enter the Matrix Zuma Deluxe Inklink Tony Hawk Pro Skater 3 Tetris for NES (Will I ever not love this game!?!)
After Christmas is a completely different story. Once my books are bought for school, it's a video game buying free-for-all. The current list is GTA: San Andreas, Halo 2, Half-life 2, KOTOR 2: Sith Lords and Inspector Parker: Betrapped.
IT'S HERE IT'S FINALLY HERE!!!
I caved in September and bought a DVD player. I didn't know when it would come out, and if I could wait that long, but it's here. The only question......
Do I run out and buy it as soon as "humanly" possible or do I wait and let some lucky soul become the greatest person in the world? Time will tell.
Lack of Physical Graffiti
Goodbye Joeuser! Hello Blogspot!
Today was absolutely bizarre and uncontrollably frustrating. The day started when I woke up at 4:54 after a 20 min nap, and returned to the computer to finish my physics essay. I started the entire thing yesterday around 1pm, when it was due today by 5pm. Ample time! It got around to 9am this morning, and I was almost finished. I decided to leave and go to the classes I skipped last week then return home and finish it before the deadline.
So first off, today was weird because for the first time in months, I was leaving for school fully awake. The Psi Factor reached danger when I noticed a driver's ed car slowly making a left turn onto my street. After my gruelling sessions with Karson the (Konqueror? Konfuser?) Asshole, I can't help but watch the torture of others. I peered into the passenger seat to see who was instructing and found a woman doing hail Marys. Awesome. Isn't that the kind of image that you want to start your day with?
Classes were alright today. Physics was frustrating because Prof brought out two demos, one was a string with a motor, the other was a glass rainbow wheel. All class I sat fixated looking at the wheel wondering "What do you do?" and "Can I get one of you for my room?" He finally went and turned it on, and my god! I let my eyes unfocus and cross (I've gotten quite good at that now) and all of a sudden my vision was filled with RED! BLUE! GREEN! YELLOW! and so forth. For 5 minutes, I forgot that I was in the belly of the beast and my impending project melted from existence. Sadly, I clued in after a while but my trip didn't end there. In film class, we were analyzing non-narrative films. So pretty much 1 hour of straight abstract images. Isle De Flores (?) was amazing. It had the bite of Bowling for Columbine, but made me laugh every other minute.
I eventually got home and after 4 ink cartridges, 3 computers, 2 printers, 1 temper tantrum, a fistfight with my printer, I finally finished my project around 5:45pm. I raced over to the drop box so that I could get home faster and sleep when, lo and behold, my TA was just getting on the elevator. I yelled after him as he stepped onto the elevator and caught the door with my foot. He checked his watch and said, "I think that has to be the closest call ever."
I went for lunch with Sean to Pita Factory but before we left, the gods looked down with pity and left a bag of Lays Originals in a nearby vending machine. I went to high school, vending machines are no match for a hungry student who once sat in a pool hall for 3 hours fishing quarters out of a broken arcade game. Why is this such a gift of grace? It's because I have no money. None at all. My account probably read 8.18 or some other lowly figure. Not even enough for a walk-in pizza. I haven't bought the last two english texts, and lunch has become only a word. A mirage that passes me on the sidewalk between classes. Thursday is payday but I already have a huge cellphone bill to pay, and relaxation supplies to buy. I'm hoping that after all of this school shit is over with, I can just sit down, drink some tea, and melt.
Today was absolutely bizarre and uncontrollably frustrating. The day started when I woke up at 4:54 after a 20 min nap, and returned to the computer to finish my physics essay. I started the entire thing yesterday around 1pm, when it was due today by 5pm. Ample time! It got around to 9am this morning, and I was almost finished. I decided to leave and go to the classes I skipped last week then return home and finish it before the deadline.
So first off, today was weird because for the first time in months, I was leaving for school fully awake. The Psi Factor reached danger when I noticed a driver's ed car slowly making a left turn onto my street. After my gruelling sessions with Karson the (Konqueror? Konfuser?) Asshole, I can't help but watch the torture of others. I peered into the passenger seat to see who was instructing and found a woman doing hail Marys. Awesome. Isn't that the kind of image that you want to start your day with?
Classes were alright today. Physics was frustrating because Prof brought out two demos, one was a string with a motor, the other was a glass rainbow wheel. All class I sat fixated looking at the wheel wondering "What do you do?" and "Can I get one of you for my room?" He finally went and turned it on, and my god! I let my eyes unfocus and cross (I've gotten quite good at that now) and all of a sudden my vision was filled with RED! BLUE! GREEN! YELLOW! and so forth. For 5 minutes, I forgot that I was in the belly of the beast and my impending project melted from existence. Sadly, I clued in after a while but my trip didn't end there. In film class, we were analyzing non-narrative films. So pretty much 1 hour of straight abstract images. Isle De Flores (?) was amazing. It had the bite of Bowling for Columbine, but made me laugh every other minute.
I eventually got home and after 4 ink cartridges, 3 computers, 2 printers, 1 temper tantrum, a fistfight with my printer, I finally finished my project around 5:45pm. I raced over to the drop box so that I could get home faster and sleep when, lo and behold, my TA was just getting on the elevator. I yelled after him as he stepped onto the elevator and caught the door with my foot. He checked his watch and said, "I think that has to be the closest call ever."
I went for lunch with Sean to Pita Factory but before we left, the gods looked down with pity and left a bag of Lays Originals in a nearby vending machine. I went to high school, vending machines are no match for a hungry student who once sat in a pool hall for 3 hours fishing quarters out of a broken arcade game. Why is this such a gift of grace? It's because I have no money. None at all. My account probably read 8.18 or some other lowly figure. Not even enough for a walk-in pizza. I haven't bought the last two english texts, and lunch has become only a word. A mirage that passes me on the sidewalk between classes. Thursday is payday but I already have a huge cellphone bill to pay, and relaxation supplies to buy. I'm hoping that after all of this school shit is over with, I can just sit down, drink some tea, and melt.
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls....
Hold your breath.
Make a wish.
Count to three.
Come with me,
and you'll be,
in a world of Pure Imagination.
Take a look,
And you'll see,
Into your imagination.
We'll begin with a spin,
Travelling in the world of my creation.
What we'll see will define,
Explanation.
If you want to view paradise,
Simply look around and view it.
Anything you want to; do it.
Want to change the world?
There's nothing to it.
There is no life I know,
to compare with Pure Imagination.
Living there you'll be free,
If you truly wish to be.
Make a wish.
Count to three.
Come with me,
and you'll be,
in a world of Pure Imagination.
Take a look,
And you'll see,
Into your imagination.
We'll begin with a spin,
Travelling in the world of my creation.
What we'll see will define,
Explanation.
If you want to view paradise,
Simply look around and view it.
Anything you want to; do it.
Want to change the world?
There's nothing to it.
There is no life I know,
to compare with Pure Imagination.
Living there you'll be free,
If you truly wish to be.