Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Eternal (Redux)

After reading Bex's post and feeling ashamed of my lack of information for the public, I thought I would recite the mindframe I had walking into her house that night.

I have already been home to shower, comb hair, deoderize, brush teeth, check for unibrow, and to put on my good blue shirt. It was 7:30pm. The prime, "red zone" for dating in any high school world. Think back to every movie and TV show. It's always "I'll pick you up/Pick me up/Meet you at/Swing by around: 7/7:30/8/quarter to eight/ fashionably late at 8."

So it's 7:30pm. Where am I? Helping my mother run the commencement in the Leaside cafeteria. Nov 1st. The night that I had a date with the sexy bex that finally came together after a two year teeter-totter of does she like me/she thinks I'm crazy/not seeing one another/there she is again. The date that was created through a cowardly scheme of ripping a note to see if her interest in me would bring her to wanting to see that note. I figured if she doesn't want to know, the shreds of paper will lie there along with my equally mutilated heart. BUT NO!!! The date comes together. We shall watch The Exorcist in her basement on friday night. The two of us alone with a horror movie. Every pubescent boy's dream. The "frightened cling." Jackpot.

Yet, I'm here looking at my mother. I was supposed to be there within the red zone but somehow its 8:45ish and I'm still staring at my mother. Frued is rising from the dead just to point and laugh. But what's this, finally I can leave!!!!! All i must do is ride my bike to Roger's Video, pick up The Exorcist then high-tail it to "the first date." Have our close-readers discovered my biggest error yet?

I promised that we would watch The Exorcist, hyping it up for weeks prior to Halloween. That's right. I waltz into a Roger's on a Friday night, THE DAY AFTER HALLOWEEN, looking for The Exorcist. Fuck beans. I am screwed. I run around searching for another seminal film, A good Nightmare, my favourite Halloween, the first Friday....nothing. I franticly bike to the blockbuster around the corner.....nothing again. I think I remember there being Chuckies everywhere, but Child's Play was already ruled out. I bike all the way down to bayview to the last Blockbuster and my final option. Once again nothing. It is only after overhearing a clerk in the third video store that I realize my stupidity of Halloween timing. Do I try and go for funny like Ghostbusters, a tried and true classic? No, you can't watch Ghostbusters after weeklong expectations of The Exorcist. After having called Bex at every video store to relate my worries, not cool by the way to all you pre-pubescent readers (it shows the fear), I finally get the message that it is after 9 and I had better get over there or we should think about doing this date another night (ie never you lame, lame loser). What do I settle for? Evil Dead 2. Couldn't even get Evil Dead 1.

I am doomed.

I race my bike over to her house, but not fast enough to build up a sweat. Stay cool, Steve. It'll be allright. I knock on the door and as it opens and I see her, the butterflies float up past my ears, whisper "you're a goner," then flee in fear. Here I go.

And whaddya know, the grandmother in the basement and Ash's live reflection hit home. Man did they ever. What would have happened with The Exorcist? What would have happened if I didn't work the commencement and we began the night at a reasonable hour? Would my lack of fear with an early arrival have made me cocky and therefore ruin my chances?

who cares.

It was only halfway through this post that I discovered that:
at some point between then and now.....
on one of my many, many trips to Rogers......
during their slow phasing out of VHS and into DVD......
I bought their copy of The Exorcist for 3 dollars.......
which now sits on my bookcase tucked in the corner......
never carrying any significance.....
until now........
four years later.