Wednesday, March 30, 2005

I thought of this last night instead of working.

If you remember back to Don McKellar's Last Night, there's the song "Guantanamera" at the end. Next time you hear it, instead of singing:

Guantanamera
Guajira Guantanamera
Guantanamera
Guajira Guantanamera

sing:

One Tiny Boobay
I Need a One Tiny Boobay
One Tiny Booooobay!
I Need a One Tiny Booooobay!

Monday, March 28, 2005

Like A Coin That Won't Get Tossed

Yah, don't bother checkin the blog for a while. I figure I'll give you all the heads up and allow you the freedom of not having to Control+N a new window for me. And I know you madly click the links on other peoples sites to get here so give the buttons a rest. School has become my prime topic of avoidance, so I'm going to divert my blog avoidance to the papers and reading. Instead of listing a whole bunch of things that I will blog later in my life, I'll just write them on this piece of paper here. suckers

If you miss me, send me an email, and in return you will recieve a shiny nickel!

(Nickels may or may not actually exist. Offer valid until 05/05. Not Applicable in Quebec. Offer Void in Utah. Not Redeemable by a Rebecca Wood.)

Monday, March 21, 2005

Happiness is a warm gun

While still steamrolling on my recent vibe of Fight clubby goodness, I found this quiz, which may possibly be the best Fight Club quiz ever!

Other news that I have forgotten to mention.

I've started trying to write crosswords. I've always wanted to submit something to the school paper, and the world could use more free crosswords to do on the subway or during class. As of now, I know of 2 campus crosswords out of at least 15 papers. This is madness. I'm going to try and write about 20 over the summer and submit them for a paper to use throughout the year. And I've having a lot of trouble. It's hard trying to fit actual words around the clues that I want to put in. My favourite clue so far is "Sandlot King - _____ "The Jet" Rodriguez" which I know is easy but what the hell, it makes people remember Sandlot. Another is Fill in the Blank - "Blanky-o, blanky-o, blank-y-OOOOooooooo." I feel like this will be hard cause as much as I want people to get the clues, I want it to be hard.

My other news is that the curling club is home to some Evil....and Dead celebrities...not to mention Musical. This is where I would run and get the name of the actor from the programs I saved from both shows but I don't care enough. He was the guy who kept saying "What a stupid, bitch!"....the horny one. Well he was practicing with two other guys at work today in his snazzy evil dead jacket. If it wasn't for the fact that I was done work and exiting the building, I might have gone out and said hi.

I think that's about it, other than the fact that I'm playing Texas Hold'Em on Tiger Gaming every waking moment. (damn Celebrity Poker and double damn Dave for being the host)

Sunday, March 20, 2005

Joan Cusack, you my only friend!

It has been 9 days since my last blog, and I'm still thinking of things to blog. My last week has been a blur. I got bogged down writing a Hedwig essay which caused me to make an appointment with Psych services. I went in and had a friendly chat with a true, stereotypically defined "queerman." We had a little chat, he asked me a bunch of questions and I found out I'm Schizophrenic with suicidal tendencies. Or I would be if that was true.

There were a few what ifs and a maybes that he threw in my direction. I went into that meeting fearing that I was depressed or Bi-polar (a la Degressi), but I came out even more paranoid about what was wrong with me. I came out with a possibility of Depression or "Severe Procrastination." Is it wrong that I'm kind of excited about the latter. Is every one else really excited about ladders now?

All my life I've thought that ADD was the one card in my hand in the deck facing backwards. I knew it was there, but I never really bothered to turn it over and check. Ever since that meeting my procrastination has become much worse.<-- Unintentionally, Fries were put in an oven and almost burnt, 3 games of Spider Solitaire were played, and a dinner was eaten between these two arrows--> I'm supposed to go make an appointment in Accessibility Services for something but I don't know for what. He did tell me that I suffer from Social Anxiety Disorder, yet another SAD. So if I don't talk to you when I see you, it's not my fault, I'm just waiting for a humongous, non-awkward lull where I can slip in a "how do." The only other thing I have to tell about my psych appointment was I asked him if there was anything I could do to stop the procrastination. I said, "...like drink green tea, or eat a lot of ginseng?"

I thought, "... Red-and-blue Tuinals, lipstick-red Seconals."

I never get a moment's peace.

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Out of the Blue And Into The Black

Right now, the 19 year old Stephen fresh out of high school is sitting in my head, bottle of Bourbon in hand, rambling. "We had a deal. We were done with school. You fucked yourself on this one. " I've been thinking a lot about that euphoria I had where school was no longer needed, yet I find myself sitting here at 12:30 voluntarily freaking out about writing an essay on a movie that I happen to love. Is this what happens to grown ups? They're fed through the machine, happy exuberant teens turned into numb wandering sheep.

At this point in my life there is so much I want to do, but it costs so much money. If I finish this university beast and get a well paying job, will I ever use that money for it's original purpose? Hell no. Right now, crime's looking pretty good. I need the funds for my fantasies.

Right now, I keep daydreaming about if I owned my own chopper. I wouldn't outfit it with missiles or bullets but BIG FUCKIN SPEAKERS!!!!! Nothing would please me more right now then to hover a chopper a hundred feet over St. George and Harbord/Hoskin and just BLAST "Keep On Rockin' In The Free World." "Another Brick In The Wall Pt 2" is a very close second. It would have to be load enough that every person in a one mile radius would have to stop what they were doing. Just imagine every class on the U of T campus, and all those students at the major junction just stopping and listening. God that would be sweet. But would that feeling be worth all this work?

I have no tolerance when it comes to following orders, which is ironic, because my tolerance is really high when it comes to...

So I got about 3 hours of sleep last night then went to class this morning. I didn't get any prep work done on this essay that's due tomorrow and so far it looks like I'm setting myself up for another Magic Realism paper. I left my class and stood there contemplating whether left would get me home faster than right. Left led to Bay but right led to Museum. However, left was a longer walk. I decided to go left so that I could break my five at Timmy's in order to achieve the ghastly TTC fare. (How long before student fare jumps from 1.70 to 2 dollars?!?!?)

I was debating my ability to write essays and more honestly attend school before I saw Mark Mckinney. MARK MCKINNEY!!!!!

MCKINNEY!!!!!! I actually stopped dead in my tracks and as I searched his face for flaws in case I was actually hallucinating, he looked at me, noticing my gaze and obvious inability to put one foot in front of the other. Like a true celeb he looked extremely tanned, deep in thought and was smoking.....bastard. He looked around then said "Hi." Words cannot masculate the giddyness I produced. I said that he looked like he had to be somewhere but that I wanted to say how big a fan I was and how I loved the contact lens monologue from KITH. He seemed detached until I asked him if he was ever going to perform Fully Committed again. Then he lit up, did the whole humble thing and shook my hand. I said goodbye and that KITH should do another tour cause the last one was brilliant. He thanked me and he was gone. Off into some copy place.

I finally got home and wanted to blog this but I couldn't get on. So I went back to bed. That was 6 hours ago, and since then I had a panicky dream that I had to go to work and then a much more satisfying dream.

My mom and I just moved into a new place. It was owned by a landlord who controlled all the houses on the block. Our greeter told us that our new couch would arrive the next day but as we left, the arm in the lock on the front door broke making the door unclosable. My mom went out to the car not caring about the lack of security while the greeter and I tried to fix the problem. We flipped the door over (his idea) but the lock was still broken and now there was an odd 7 inch gap at the bottom. Then I began searching the rest of the house for a replacement door. We checked the entire floor until I found a perfect size with lock. Then the phone rang and I woke up.

Cha?

This Is The Greatest Blogging Moment Of My Life

Hopefully this will take a second to load on your computer and I can get in a quick goodbye!

As soon as this puppy finishes you'll be whisked away to a Blogger alert page. All is well, for that is the price I pay for paying tribute to gods!
Or you could just click stop after the movie before it redirects you. Whichever's easier.
Click Here For ACDC Goodness

Didn't want to ruin that song for ya!

Monday, March 07, 2005

Holy Floydian Odyssey!

Just something else that I must buy and will inevitably post-pone schoolwork.

Think Pink....Yesterday

For some strange reason I never got around to blogging this.

Happy Birthday David Gilmour!



At a youthful 58, I hope you continue to make me question my sanity!

This is what he looks like from a drug-free perspective, ie you.

Friday, March 04, 2005

I must be slipping in my old age!

So it turns out that yesterday was payday. For the first time in my entire run of working at the curling club, I forgot it was payday. Bwa?

So it's a quarter to 1 on a friday. I'm sitting in Robarts on the 13th floor (my favourite floor) when I should be in an English tutorial. Last night I believed my attendance to be a make or break factor for that class but I remembered that this crucial piece of paper that I needed was available online. So I didn't go. I have to kill time before my 2 o clock lecture which I don't want to go to. I don't want to ruin this book since I haven't read it yet, and I don't feel like trying to keep myself awake for 2 hours before I go to work. I think I'll go nap in the backseat of the car until 4.

I was up til 4:30 last night tossing and turning. Nothing like staying up for a good solid 20.5 hours when you're already exhausted. I think I was up so late because I had a great day yesterday and I didn't really want it to end. I feared that madness would be nipping at it's heels and of course, this morning sucked. I was woken up again at 8 and as I lay in bed contemplating which object around my bed would make the best melee weapon, my mother hovered around me cleaning up all the crap on my floor. I really thought that she and I were past this. It's my damn room, I know where everything is, when it gets dirty I'll clean it. She asks me how I know what's on this floor when there's so much stuff. Simple, I was the one who put that stuff there. I just like to think of my floor as the desk that I never had.

Car nap here I come!

Thursday, March 03, 2005

But this is a shop for ladies!

Now that I've finally used that as a blog title I assume that I should blog.

The past while has been very disorienting. I've been down and out for a while so I decided to do some research on just what the hell is going on inside my head. I found a checklist on the web for symptoms of depression and a few of them kind of shook me up a little. Heather from work mentioned that I've been very different the past few days which doesn't seem to mean anything cause she only saw me on Sunday when I had to cover someone else's shift and the dishwasher broke and flooded the entire the kitchen and room below. She said I was irritable. No shit. You mop up gungy water (with sponges in my hands for a bit) and you try to be Marty/Mary Sunshine.

Life has become difficult lately. I'm falling behind in schoolwork and not really attending all of my classes. I don't really go to the tutorials anymore since I have grown tiresome of sitting in a chair for an hour and not talking. I've been dodging my seminar every week ever since I passed on the essay, and I even missed yesterday's screening because I knew that I could not deal with the movie. This is doubled with the fact that the new guy Evan at work (my padowan) broke his collarbone when he slipped and fell on the ice. My one fear working at the curling club was that I would slip and my pebbling can would crack open unleashing a ice-flattening wave of water. Well it happened to him, not me. So I'm slightly grateful except that since I'm really the only part-timer there (ever since Heather switched to "office duties" which really means she's slow on the ice and doesn't like cleaning) I have to pick up Evan's shifts. Pat has also been asking for a few nights off, and I feel like he more than deserves it. He's been closing Monday to Friday since October. So now I'm working like a mofo when I should really be studying and catching up. I worked last night for Pat and I'm going in tonight as usual before I have to close Friday and Saturday and go in for my regular Sunday shift. It looks like I'll be at work on Saturday til around 3 in the morning and I have to be in at 11:30 the next (same?) day. I wish we had that 9 hour turnaround that IATSE enforces. So I'm going to be tired and blogless unless of course I repeat last year's sweet ass haul from the raffle. Then I'll have to brag.

I've been playing a lot, I mean a lot, (ALOT) of Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II lately. It seems that if I have a moment to spare I'm in the game trying to be as freakin evil as I possibly can. I rob every single person I can, Force Persuade people into giving me their money then jumping into pits or off of stations, and sass-mouth anyone I damn well please. I wanted to post a pic of my man all angry looking with the swirly red smoke in the background that shows just how freakin evil he is, so I'll try that when I get home. I fell like everyone should play this game....or at least watch me play this game and let me share the Jedi love. I fear Bex has become extremely bored with my monotonous discussion of just how sweet this game is. When she asked me what I did that day, I started thinking "Well after I landed on Korriban...." There's a little too much evil in me right now (game and mind produced) that I felt like I had to counter-balance with some goodness.

When I closed last Sunday, I had my headphones on to drown out the Oscars so that I wouldn't ruin the yawnfest when I got home. Aside from vacuuming to Billie Jean (which I think should have been on my life's TO-DO list since it was so much fun), I listened to "Cool" from West Side Story while I worked on the ice. I got a craving for the theatrical thugs. I've been watching the movie every night since. I can't believe I forgot just how much I love that movie and I was a little surprised that I knew the lyrics and dialogue so well. I started figuring out who I would want to be in the movie and who I would actually be (Former: Ice Latter: that girl who follows them around). Now that I'm watching it over and over it keeps surprising me with how well the movie and audio are synced up and just how great the choreography is.

The only problem with this lifestyle is that I keep forgetting that if I sass-mouth people on the street I don't have my trusty saber or a 7-foot walking carpet behind me. On the other hand, I have no trouble remembering single lines from WSS that repeat in my head like a broken record. All I really need is some Battle Meditation to clear my mind. Stupid non-existing force.