Other songs that I would play for my bike's funeral:
Green Eyed Lady - The Guess Who
Anything from Sabbath Bloody Sabbath
Neon Knights - Black Sabbath
One of These Days or Echoes - Pink Floyd
or the too cliche:
Bicycle Race - Queen
Bike - Pink Floyd
I'm not saying that she's out for the count but she has been severely wounded. With no wheels, no peddle, bad breaks and a broken bullhorn she's not the starlight she once was. It's going to be a little weird riding the new bike.
For my entire high school career that bike was my life. I feel like no matter how hard I try I could never do it justice with a single post. For 4 years it was an extension of my body. The shit that I pulled on that bike, I know I'll never do with this one. It's sad to say, but I've lost a bit of that "balls to the wall" riding in the valley.
I was never really excited when I got that bike. It never replaced anything since the previous was long gone and stolen. I do remember that I was proud of the 18 gears. I recently realized that the notion of men buying Dodge Vipers to make up for the wee willy extends back to the days of biking. It seems clear as day now that the more gears you had on your bike, the more of a man you were. A close comparison:
Men
"Only a real man can handle all that horsepower."
Boys
"Only a real man can shift through all those gears."
To pick up Women
"Yeah, it goes from zero to 60 in under 3 seconds."
To pick up Girls
"Yeah, it's got up to and including 18 gears. I can get up to about 50 on that baby."
It obviously makes sense that I was very hesitant to part with my peddle penis after all the years. I can ride that bike through anything. After you crash on a bike so many times (about 50 or 60 i would guess), you don't really fear the impending doom of running reds or cutting across bridges. That's why I think it's going to take me forever to get anywhere now. Until that first tragic wreck, it's gonna be "nice and easy does it."
Memorable Moments
- Riding down the hill without brakes behind the Redway Loblaws....and surviving.
- the ride down Sunnybrook Hill after the infamous Shroom Trip of 2004
- dressing all in black, sneaking out at night at riding around during the blackout.
- The Big Crash on my way to Spiral Garden where I broke my first bone. That crash crippled the bike for than me causing me to carry it all the way to Spiral. That crash will always keep strong in my mind that pain heals. (as do untended bones)
- the day sean saw me fall of a stone wall and discovered that when I'm REALLY hurt I don't actually say anything instead of my constant whining.
- goin 50+ down eglinton in the middle of the road at 2am running every red I saw with no other car in sight.
- the day I almost left my bike in the valley after carrying it through loop roots for 3 miles......then carrying it another 5 home.
- That first summer when I knew every tree stump in every trail in the valley.
- I was riding home from school on Donlands when I went to do a wheelie of the curb only to see the front wheel drop off the bike and roll away. I slid on the fork for a foot or two before toppling end over end onto the runaway wheel, smashing the rim, sending a stray spoke through my right leg...then carrying the bike home from Donlands and O'Connor.
- Ramming the bike into portables between games during my soccer referee stint
- Riding down all the stairs
- Wearing plastic bags over my sneakers as I trudged through rainfall after rainfall
- Grade 10 where I biked to school everyday except for the days I played hooky.
- the winter of grade 10 and loving every penny I saved on bus fare.
- My infamous 7 minute 8 second ride to school.
- Cruising with the boys
(Gotta end it before this turns into a yearbook comment or the carrying moments outnumber the actual riding moments.)
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